The 80s were a decade known primarily for crimes against fashion. Mullet haircuts, enormous shoulder pads and wearing suits without socks were what made the decade memorable for all of the wrong reasons.
Another fashion atrocity was the ridiculously brightly coloured jumper. I am pleased to say that this was the only one of the four sartorial evils that I embraced, and boy did I embrace it. Which puts me on a par with Noel Edmonds, Mike Reid and the like, I know. And I am suitably ashamed!
Complicit in this crime was my maternal grandmother. No pattern was too vivid and bold for Gran. In fact, she enthusiastically welcomed them, as they were easier for her to knit with her diminishing eyesight.
My favourite was a black sweater with two vertical white stripes running across each breast and thin coloured strips running horizontally at regular intervals, like a deranged tartan.
There were sweaters knitted in wool that was itself multi-coloured, ones made of bold squares of colour and even one which was not only patches of coloured and patterned squares, but which had a huge ‘R’ over the heart. That last one was pushing it, even for me, and I rarely wore it.
Unfortunately, all of the photographs of me dressed like this were accidentally destroyed maliciously some time ago. However, I did have a rugby shirt which was also made up of stitched together sections of other shirts. I was stunned to see someone wearing a similar one about a week ago, and snatched a photo. It honestly isn’t me. I’d never be seen dead in cords…